Hot off the press

My new ironing machine, the hot mangle press, has arrived. It is not large; it is enormous. In fact it is so big I can't imagine where I am going to put it. It is also very heavy and took two burly men to haul it from van to hall. I can't get it out of its box. It may have to sit there forever. Oh Mr Smith will be so cross with me. Perhaps he will help me shift it up the stairs and into its new home - I doubt it ... "You spent your inheritance on an entirely unnecessary ironing machine, you sort it out." Mmmmm. I will put a tablecloth over the box and pretend it isn't there. But it's so so so big. Admittedly I did get the extra big machine as it was a special deal and the same exhorbitant price as the smaller one. I have just reinspected it...... This could be a very expensive mistake.

On the other hand if I do get it up and running we will have crispy sheets in a few seconds, rather than a fortnight, and we can have clean sheets every Monday, and you can bring yours round too to have a go.

I remember once learning a rude rhyme about a mangle ... I've forgotten how it went but I know it rhymed with dangle. I'll be careful.