No car, no Oyster, no loo

My beautiful little Mercerdes Maclaren had a terrible mishap yesterday. There I was pottering around town with the roof down when it looked like rain so I thought I'd better close up quick and stop being such a poser. Oh no, it was stuck. After a dash to Mayday motors where heads were scratched a ums were erred, we decided the best idea was to take it to MacDonalds in Wandsworth; there is a Mercedes garage next door. I was beginning to get really anxious as the sky was getting blacker and blacker. Luckily Mercedes in Wandsworth were lovely and kind and caring and a nice member of Hitler Youth took great care to park my car somewhere safe and dry in the Mercedes private clinic where it has to stay until it feels better.

I had to walk home because Mr Smith had borrowed my Oyster card. Why can't he get his own?

Elusive Dave the Plumber appeared today two months after disappearing for a spare part for my loo. He still had no loo part but took an active interest in the Apprentice's shed building. He also promised to return to fix the loo and the upstairs leak (5 months after his original summons) and make Mr Smith's shower work. I made the shower work, eventually, after physically sucking all the air out of the pipe with Elusive Dave watching. "That'll be £60 says Elusive Dave". Oh I see. Well I am not paying him unless he comes back to mend my loo. I am attaching elastic to his car. Sometimes I think it would be quicker to qualify as a plumber onself than wait for Elusive Dave to show up. I hope Mr Smith appreciates my efforts.